Jordan Bolker
Staff Writer
College students in America have become so lazy that as we reach the end of 2014, we can hardly finish our own sentences.
Today, many students of the North Central College campus simply respond with the words “I can’t even…” every time they hear or see someone performing an overbearingly hilarious action or comment. Although the comment is making you laugh until your ribs crack, is it really worth making that moment in your life totally “uneven?”
Here are some ways that you can “even” out your life while still enjoying the hysterical moments that are Facebook, Twitter, or social gatherings:
Find a way to finish the sentence:
What makes you unable to handle what just took place? Many of us can only search so deep in the mind to find out what makes you “uneven.” Look deep into your mind and say what you’re actually dealing with. If it is truly that difficult, find a dictionary to help you or simply laugh. That way, by the next time your “even-ness” is tested, you can say “I can’t even deal with this nonsense!” and walk away with pride.
Work out:
Can’t even handle the overload of last-minute-assigned papers and group projects? What about all the retail stores who are stocking up for the Christmas season and skipping the joy of Thanksgiving? Take an hour out of your stressful schedule, put on some workout clothes, and head to Res/Rec and take a jog around the track. Don’t think you can do without motivation? Download “Rock My Run” into your phone, an app that plays DJ-engineered mixes that are upbeat and get your blood flowing quickly. The music on the app is scientifically proven to help you work out more efficiently while having fun at the same time. Though it may not permanently “even” out your dealings with academics, work, or holiday shopping, working out gives you an hour’s worth of satisfaction that you can make it through the next two weeks of the term.
Sing “Let It Go”:
The “Frozen” craze and obsession may be wearing down slowly, but Idina Menzel’s chart topper hasn’t failed to give power to college students who suffer the “can’t even disease.” Many parodies have been comically created throughout the Internet to relate to the typical work and academic schedule of college campuses like North Central College, especially during the agonizing weeks of midterms and finals. By singing this newly famous Disney song, you can literally let go of the imperfections of making the Dean’s List and focus on doing the best you can, the way Queen Elsa did.
Get in the car and go home:
Sometimes we all need to get away from the busy streets of Naperville and spend a weekend at home with our families. It’s also a good opportunity to reunite with some good friends from your high school days. Relax on the non-squeaky couch and get a fire going as the November chill reaches the Midwest. Live out in the countryside? Have a field party before the snow starts falling and light a roaring bonfire with all the wood you have. Live somewhere that is not surrounded by cornfields? Try cooking dinner for your parents and siblings to celebrate your homecoming and afterwards, watch the Blackhawks game. When you come back from your nice weekend at home, you’ll go from an AmeriCAN’T even to an AmeriCAN even.
