College is a time where we finally get a sense of who we are. Our independence almost reaches its peak. Becoming an individual is the first step in a young adult’s self-justice. We do things for ourselves because we can and not because someone told us to.
But that doesn’t mean going to college isn’t tough. We’re away from family for extended periods of time, classes are exhausting, we learn how to survive on coffee and Pop-Tarts. Not to mention the complexities of meeting new people at a moment where we are just beginning to know ourselves.
International Student Ana Cvetkovic, ’21, said that all of this can be overwhelming, especially when adjusting to college life. “It’s hard sometimes because I am so busy with all the things I do …” said Cvetkovic. “Plus, when I was younger, I was adjusting to a new place.”
Cvetkovic is originally from Serbia and found the shift from her life at home to life in the U.S. confusing and, at times, frustrating. “Americans are so much more passive when telling other people what they think. In Serbia, we aren’t afraid to burn a bridge if we think it’s honest,” said Cvetkovic. The strain of trying to adjust to another culture while also holding onto one’s own cultural background is exhausting.
Even moving from one state to another is difficult for anyone looking to find a college experience that’s right for them. Claire Klaisner, ’20, found it difficult to adjust to a completely new environment.
“I wanted to go to a smaller school and I think that North Central was a great fit for me. It was hard, though, because I’m from Wisconsin, so I didn’t know anybody,” said Klaisner.
But why go to college in the first place? What can students get out of it besides a piece of paper and thousands of dollars of debt? “I’ve learned how to be independent and take care of myself in my own way. I plan my own schedule and keep my needs met on my own,” said Klaisner.
Cvetkovic had similar things to say about her newfound self-sufficiency, “Yes, my parents help me financially, but I’m the one taking care of everything else. I get internships, apply to jobs, all of the stuff that you need to do when you’re an adult.”
In a 2016 study by the University of Texas, researchers found that students, specifically international students, became more confident in their sense of self and matured more quickly. This, in turn, added to students’ sense of responsibility and independence. A 2005 study from Journal of Student Life found that students also performed better academically because of these new psychosocial changes.
Being on your own can’t be the only thing that keeps someone going. Social support from family and friends is needed to be successful in college. Cvetkovic said that her family may not always understand why she does what she does, but they trust her to do the right thing for herself. “My parents love me and know that I am smart and they keep supporting me even if they don’t always know the things I am doing or get I have to do things certain ways,” said Cvetkovic.
“I have support from my parents and friends that I’ve met while I’ve been here, and it’s made it easier for me to build my own life in this space because of that,” said Klaisner
College is a time of self-discovery and students sometimes find it difficult to figure out who they are.
“You have moments of relapse, like when you make a mistake, you have to take complete ownership of that, and sometimes that’s hard. You think ‘I want to go home,’ or something like that, but eventually you have to work things out for yourself,” said Klaisner.
Mistakes are a big part of learning, and Cvetkovic said that she is no stranger to them. “I had to learn so fast how Americans work, and sometimes it’s hard. I would say the wrong thing at the wrong time … and it would become an issue. I used to say whatever popped into my head, but now I’ve learned to filter my thoughts,” said Cvetkovic.
Both Klaisner and Cvetkovic said they feel more independent now. They understand how their lives were impacted by their choice to attend school away from home.
“It’s changed me a lot. I’m definitely more understanding now. I can think about things before I say them, and really get my point across without any problem,” said Cvetkovic. “Traveling here has made me more comfortable with being on my own, and more confident in who I am.”
The old saying goes that with great power comes great responsibility. The self-power and independence college provides can lead to not just newfound experiences, but newfound selves.
“I definitely feel like I’ve changed a lot over the four years I’ve been here,” said Klaisner. “And I think that’s a good thing.”
