Do you put the chance of pregnancy in God’s hands or do you take control of the situation? With the many birth control options readily available to people such as the pill and condoms, how does that relate to people and their religious views?
“It’s important to understand what sex is and how powerful it is and how it changes you and that’s not something to take lightly. Abstinence is absolutely the only thing that will prevent a pregnancy but even inside marriages you should still practice chastity,” Leslie Stopka, Catholic campus minister said.
Birth control continues to evolve while technology continues to improve but the only guarantee to not have an unwanted pregnancy is to abstain from sexual intercourse.
The connection between sex and a higher figure is one that is often not thought about while on college campuses. The idea of sex being an intimate and emotional aspect of a relationship amongst two adults can often be overlooked.
“There is a spiritual element to a sexual relationship, that it is something good and beautiful and something God created us for,” Eric Doolittle, college Chaplin said.
The conversation of if sex is something we are allowed to enjoy while not being in a marriage is often called into question for those who aren’t the strictest with following their religion but still believe in a higher power. If God created this beautiful thing for us, then why am I not able to enjoy it whenever I want?
Stopka talked about Pope Pius and his thoughts about birth control and other life issues. She talked about how he said if you allow it, there will become a slippery slope. Men will then become more tempted, the objectification of women will grow, men will no longer take responsibility of their actions, divorce will increase and families will be broken.
Was he right?
In today’s society, we have seen divorce rates rise, single-parent households have become more normalized throughout the years and we hear on the news about how men sexually harass women more and more.
“I think churches have done a really poor job about talking about this. I think generally speaking, speaking for the Protestant Church, but broadly looking at a culture, they treat it like a third rale. That somehow, you know what families can deal with this and schools can deal with this, so we don’t have to,” Doolittle said.
Turning a blind eye on a topic that many can feel uncomfortable with having, can lead to misinformation when looking at available resources. Doolittle and Stopka both talk about how the Bible talks about this topic, but it isn’t as upfront as feed the hungry, which causes difficulty for Protestant Churches because they don’t have the specific language for it.
Because there is a negative stigma around birth control, some believe it is a conversation that should only be had between a woman and her doctor. But what if talking to your doctor isn’t enough?
While people within the church people look for the guidance of a higher power, his teachings are what they follow.
“Their understanding of it is ‘well if you have sex you’ll get a disease, get pregnant and die.’ That’s what happens if you have sex outside of marriage. If you have it inside marriage, it’s all good,” Stopka said.
We can see teachings like this in movies such as “Mean Girls” but what happens when someone learns that having sex before marriage doesn’t actually cause them to die?
“It’s almost like Adam and Eve when they said, ‘don’t eat of the tree of fruit and knowledge, of good and evil or you will die,’ oh and then they don’t and it’s like ‘well what’s going on now.’ Once you figure out that you can have sex and not do those things it’s like ‘well shoot here we go,'” Doolittle said.
Birth control isn’t just about the need or want of preventing a pregnancy. For some they might go on the pill to regulate their hormones or prevent migraines. But when a person is wanting to use birth control for having multiple partners that’s when Stopka feels there is a need for having a deeper conversation.
The double standard between sexually active men and women is noticed not only within society but also within the church as well.
Stopka talks about the sex culture we currently live in, how it is everywhere, and we’re immersed in it. She elaborates on how the boys get praised but then the girls get shamed for having it.
The negative stigma about sex and the church can be an ongoing conversation.
“It goes back to the way that so many churches have approached all of those societal pressures. That list of don’ts. Don’t have sex, don’t do drugs. This isn’t a black and white issue, there is a lot of gray area,” Doolittle said.
On the other side of the argument, Stopka said, “I think it’s good to have a framework. I understand why the Catholic Church has said no sterilization, no birth control and no abortion is because they believe in the sanctity of life and they believe that is God-given.”
The differences between what is taught and what is practical are two different things for some. Using some sort of protection might not necessarily be bad in cases and the “sinner” would then be forgiven. So, the gray area with the topic of birth control usage in certain religions then gets called into question.
How to implement the knowledge of the teachings and then how to apply that to the topic at hand instead of yes or no, right or wrong, for when the messiness of life comes is what both Stopka and Doolittle want people to understand.
Understanding why the church is saying you can’t do something is important. It is also important to understand that using moderation with what the church tells you that you are not allowed to do is acceptable in current day situations.
Doolittle talks about how there is an honesty that comes from those who feel as though this is sinful and they choose to not cross that line. He elaborates on how those who have that perspective can think it is damaging to the soul and take it seriously.
“There is a spectrum of inherently evil things. Abortion is a pretty big sin, it’s taking a human life, versus masturbation or wearing condom. I mean it’s a little bit smaller down the scale. I think that’s important too when it’s sexual things when it comes to religion and where does it lay on that spectrum of seriousness,” Stopka said.
The one-on-one communication that someone has with a minister varies. If a person chooses to use birth control or not also varies person-to-person. It’s often seen as an intimate and personal choice.
The Methodist Church currently promotes the use of birth control because of the many societal issues, whereas the Catholic Church has remained against birth control in their teachings.
